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Couples Counseling

  • Do you and your partner keep running into the same roadblocks when communicating with each other?
  • Do you feel that stress and not having enough time in the day has put a distance between the two of you?
  • Have either of you had an infidelity in your relationship and do not know how to recover?
  • Do you just want to be connected to your partner again?

I can help the two of you communicate effectively, heal and recover from infidelity, dissolve relational distress and connect on a deeper level, close any gap of distance to prevent loneliness and heal from past and present hurt.

Approach

I typically work from relational living therapy, emotionally focused therapy, mindfulness, along with incorporating the body/mind Psychotherapy approach.

RLT aims to help partners resolve conflicts, take personal accountability, develop equality, improve communication, and develop deeper connections within relationships. All relationships experience cycles of harmony, disharmony, and repair. Repair is critical for a successful relationship and RLT teaches effective methods on how to properly repair any damage. Great resource: The New Rules of Marriage and I Don't Want to Talk about it by Terrence Real

EFT is an approach to couples therapy and has developed alongside the science on adult attachment and bonding to look into what is happening in couple relationships. EFT was created by Sue Johnson. Typically, when our partner does something that intensely upsets us, it usually means they poked one of our old wounds. In therapy, we address what comes up when your partner does said things, help you partner empathize with your wounds, which in turns helps them to understand that it’s not just about them creating problems (when someone thinks they are entirely to blame they retreat into a safe spot of defensiveness) so they can turn to you and help you heal and work toward reacting/responding in a different way, and vice versa. Great resource: Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson

Mindfulness is a flavor of awareness that arises by deliberately paying attention to the present moment, without judgment. It is also the cultivation and practice of an intentional new, internal method of processing awareness accompanied by a detached posture toward the present moment. The ability to conduct a “body scan” and move your mindful awareness to notice tension in your body provides an opportunity to down-regulate when a conversation might be starting to go south with your partner. Great resource: Mindsight by Daniel Siegal

Body/Mind Psychotherapy is a somatic-cognitive approach to therapy that incorporates elements of physiology, psychotherapy, and mindfulness. Have you ever heard of the saying, "the issues are in the tissues?" Stress and trauma not only affect the brain, but also the nervous system, which can result in a whole range of physical symptoms - this is why it is essential to engage not only the mind, but the body to heal. Great resource: The Body Keeps Score by Van der Kolk Bessel A

Higher Success Rate

If you are seeking a counselor, it’s a sign that you are ready to learn, heal and grow. Don’t wait till it’s too late. Couples who seek help earlier in their relationship have a much higher success rate.